I guess it started to get worse
when I decided to build my own house
in a sweat equity program
and by the time we got to the fourth month of working
and I barely had a roof on my house
I started dating women
who thought I was marriage material
because I had building materials
in my front yard
but the worse thing was
after they moved on
I would read in the paper shortly after
and find out that they had gotten married
to someone else
and the fourth time this happened to me
I started to wonder
was it me?
or was I reaching the age
where one makes those kind of half-baked decisions
called marriage
or was it the house
that symbolized that I had organized my life
enough to deceive a lender into a home loan
then I met this Colombian woman
who would give birth to my four children
and before that would happen,
her mother and brother came to our wedding
and four years later,
I asked when they were gonna leave?
instead we moved to Madison
I had a new job, smaller house, larger mortgage
but my bosses didn’t tell me the employees had chased out the old director
and joined together to make my work life hell
and no matter what decision I made
even a good one that they agreed on
it was wrong
I was wrong
and it was getting worse
so, I stayed working longer then I could bear
and the employees all walked away,
except one
who I had to fire and he gave me more then enough reasons
to change his employment history
I published a poetry anthology
my mom died
my children no longer listen to me
but it could be worse
and I know it
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